For the longest time, I was addicted to my phone. I relentlessly checked social media, emails, and CNN in an attempt always to feel on top of my game, and I loved that I was known for always being so speedy to reply every single time someone reached out to me. I was so passionate about my business, and I hustled hard. Only, I was missing my life. If I was honest with myself, it was exhausting, and I’d caused my loved ones to build up some major resentment to my business, my iPhone, and really, me. Do you ever feel like you’re a slave to your business, and are neglecting the other things you hold dear? It may be time to reevaluate your priorities, and embrace a business detox!
News flash: people rarely envy workaholics. Busy shouldn’t be worn like a badge of honor. Just because you’re always working, doesn’t mean you’re accomplishing great things.
I believe that to run a profitable, passion-filled business; we have to have some sense of balance in our lives. Because it’s hard to do your best work when you’re burned out, frazzled, or feeling guilty because you just told your daughter you’d be in to read her a story in a minute, and turned off the computer an hour later only to find her snoring, for the 23rd time this month.
Does it ever feel like your business, and your digital devices, are at the center of your life?
If you do, you know how freakin’ crummy that feels! Guilt is a nasty beast, and when you’re a slave to your work, it’s hard not to feel guilty about all the things you’re giving up.
My “Aha!” moment came when a client made a comment about how she didn’t know how I managed to do as much as I did.
My first thought was, “because I have no stinkin’ life outside of my business and I think my family secretly kind of hates me for it.” Whoa.
So, I decided to go on a digital/business detox, and focus more on the things that brought me joy, and the people who meant the world to me, by living in the moment and setting strict “rules” for my business. Since then, not only have I found so much more happiness, but my business has flourished!
If you’re in need of a little work/life balance, here are my favorite ways to detox and bring what is crucial, to the center!
Prioritize Your Passions
Write down the people and things that you cherish the most, commit to always keeping them at the center, and think of ways to incorporate more non-negotiable time focusing on them into your schedule. Then, create a personal mission statement! Mine looks like this:
Family, friends, faith, me time, and my business are my top priorities. I am at my best when I create and stick to a detailed schedule, and feel authentic when my schedule reflects my priorities. I am at my worst when I fail to plan strategically, and when I allow the small stuff to cloud my judgment. I can best serve the people that matter to me by scheduling more meaningful face time with them, and remembering to silence my phone (and not look at it!) while I’m doing so. I will give myself thirty minutes of downtime each day, and spending it purely on myself, will be non-negotiable. My business will have clear, set hours, and I will not schedule in time with friends, or allow myself to get distracted during those times. Church will be attended each Sunday, and no clients will be scheduled on Tuesdays so that I can attend bible study classes (cell phone not allowed in either of those spaces). I will strive always to be helpful, understanding, patient, present, and authentic.
Remember, when you say “yes” to something, you’re ALWAYS saying “no” to something else. Cramming in that one extra client next week takes away from your family time. Saying “yes” to lunch with a girlfriend means you don’t get your work done (and will probably have to make up for it later, taking away time from something else). Agreeing to watch Aunt Sue’s dog next weekend means missing your BFF’s dinner party. When you understand what matters most, prioritizing things, and saying no to things that don’t match your mission statement, will become SO much easier!
Become an Expert Choice Maker
Sometimes, the biggest changes come from a culmination of tiny steps. Each day, you’re faced with about a zillion choices.
I was surprised at how much the little things mattered to the people I love. Something as simple as leaving my phone in the car when I took my daughter to the park made her SO happy. Making a choice to put buying and arranging flowers at the same time each week a priority, so that I would have beautiful blooms to look at on the daily, gave me a happiness boost every morning when I sat down at my desk.
Aiming to overhaul your life in a day is a tall order, and big, sudden changes like that often end in failure. Instead, aim to make small changes that will stick! Create office hours. Schedule in a date night once per week. Promise to not look at your phone when you’re playing with your kids. Stop checking Instagram while you’re at dinner with your BFF.
Be MINDFUL of the choices you make. I now do not commit to things without having time to mull the idea over, because I find that my knee-jerk reaction is to overcommit and people please. If I get an email now about baking for the PTA, I put the phone down and think about it for an hour. If baking three dozen cookies next week feels stressful, I don’t volunteer! If a friend wants to grab Starbucks, but I look at my schedule for that day, and it’s jam packed, I say no. The truth is, when I’m over-scheduled, I don’t even enjoy the things that are supposed to be fun, and seeing friends or getting a facial feels stressful. Don’t fill your days with so many small things that the big things start to feel like chores!
Embrace the Buddy System
Find someone you trust, who also struggles with feeling unbalanced, and keep each other in check! Set a time each month to meet, and talk about your feelings, and work together to come up with ways to honor your priorities, and stop sweatin’ the small stuff.
Sometimes, just having someone to be honest with, makes all the difference! Making changes is hard, and having someone to cheer you on, and give you a swift (but loving!) kick in the butt when your actions aren’t aligned with your priorities, is an excellent way to stay focused.
If you don’t have anyone in your life that you feel comfortable reaching out to, consider finding a friend online! Skype, FaceTime, and Google Hangouts make chatting with people all around the world a breeze, so if regaining control and living a life more focused on the people and things that fill your love tank is a priority you want to embrace, reach out to someone and become reformed workaholic warriors!
What are your top priorities? Do you ever feel like you’ve lost sight of what’s important to you? Tell me your story in the comments!
Latest posts by Kimberly Haydn (see all)
- Holiday Hacks + How to Have a Good Enough Christmas (and LOVE it) - December 5, 2018
- Increase Summer Sales with These Marketing Ideas! - July 4, 2018
- Seasons of Change: Navigating Building a Business while Raising Your Children - September 24, 2017